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I became a mom when I was 21 years old and a college student. I got pregnant during my sophomore year, so I spent a lot of time trying to juggle attending class every day, doctor's appointments, homework, and preparing for my daughter's birth. But most of all, I was worried about how I would continue going to school and take care of my baby.
I ended up having my daughter at the end of the semester, the day after finals. Therefore, I was able to enjoy my summer with her and not have to focus on school for the next couple of months. This particular summer went by so fast, and I was not ready to depart from my baby. That's a whole other conversation for another blog post.
However, I had to welcome the journey of balancing college and motherhood. Like you and many others, I did not have a blueprint for accomplishing this.
I knew God had a plan for me and the only way I would succeed in my journey was by following his direction.
These tips are what I utilized in order to accomplish graduating with a bachelor's and master's degree while being a single parent.
You have to manifest everything you desire.
Before your dreams become a reality, you must believe they will. To be successful and accomplish your goals, you need to have faith.
It starts in our thinking. If you don't believe you can do it, you never will.
Your words can either promote you or block you from the next level.
I'm sure we have all heard the saying, "Speak it into Existence" this is an excellent mentality because our words are powerful and control our future.
Declare affirmations over yourself, your dreams, and your life.
Prayer works, and I made it part of my everyday routine. Let God in daily and tell him what's on your heart.
Set long-term and short-term goals.
Setting goals creates a blueprint for accomplishments. Of course, the primary goal is to graduate college, be more knowledgeable, receive a certification, etc.
However, starting with short-term goals will help you break down the steps you need to take to accomplish the long-term goal. Here are some examples:
-Studying for at least 8 hours a week
- Wake up an hour before or stay up an hour later than the kids
- Make the honor roll each semester
- Attend every class and be on time
- Turn in every assignment ahead of schedule
Once you have an idea of the goals you want to accomplish, write them down and set up an action plan. I have created a GOAL SETTING PLANNER [100+ Pages] for you to get started today.
Create, plan, and conquer your goals daily. This will change your life and unlock your full potential.
Choose the right college or program.
Choose a school that will fit your needs. Your needs are finding a schedule that will work for your family.
Therefore, it would be best to build your plan around your children. Avoid fitting your children into your schedule. It will not work.
If your child is in school between 8-3 PM, schedule your classes around those times.
During undergrad, I worked at night, went to school in the morning, and slept in the evening.
My daughter was with my parents at night and attended daycare during the day.
Don't be afraid to ask for help. Your support system should be a part of the process when picking a program.
You may have to pick your classes around their schedule and keep that in mind.
For stay-at-home moms, if it's beneficial for you to go to school at night, search for programs that offer 100% online courses.
Everyone's path is different. What worked for your friend, sister, or co-worker might not work for you and that's okay.
Finding the right college or program is an essential part of your success. Don't rush to start and not take time to consider the best course of action.
God tells us in Proverbs 19, not to rush into anything because it can lead to us doing it wrong. He wants us to succeed in life, so he's saying to lay a good foundation, don't be anxious, or you'll miss your blessing.
Add organization to your set of skills.
Get a planner. Your planner should be dedicated to college students. It needs to contain multiple sections (to-do-list, daily chart, habit tracker, goals tracker, assignments, etc.) to help you stay organized on paper.
There are many planners out there, but having one that fits your needs is essential.
I'm a visual person, so utilizing a planner helped me to keep track of daily tasks for school and at home. I recommend buying a planner that will cater to your college student and mom life balance.
I encourage you to buy the planner before classes start. On average your syllabus becomes available a week prior to school starting. Take the time to go through your syllabus and apply important date to your calendar.
You will not be able to survive college or life at home without one.
Block-out scheduling will be your best friend.
Your calendar should be messy and filled with activities, so you can see what you need to do throughout the day. Color coding is a handy tool.
School (Blue)
Meetings (Yellow)
Gymnastics (Pink)
Work (Purple)
Assignments Due (Red)
Be very detailed when writing down your schedule.
Pick a day to do laundry, go to the gym, bring kids to the park, study for a test, etc.
Hold yourself accountable for managing your schedule and being realistic with your time.
You need to know your "why."
It would help if you acknowledged why you want to pursue a higher education. Determine your reason for wanting to go back to school.
Write your vision and make it plain (Habakkuk 2:2). Post it around your house, on the mirror in the bathroom, or use it as a screensaver.
Waking up and seeing your vision every morning will force you to focus and remember what you are trying to achieve.
Your why will be your motivation to keep going when you start to have doubts. In addition, it will help identify if pursuing a degree is the right path for you.
Some people seek higher education because they see someone who has a good job, makes a lot of money and has a degree. Then they start going to school but eventually quit.
Their failure is because going back to school and receiving a degree differs from what they wanted.
They see what others have, which looks good, but their desire or purpose needs to be more vital to get it.
Your "Why" will be the reason you either succeed or fail. If it is not powerful enough, then you will not achieve it.
I continued going to school to get into law school and fulfill my dream of becoming an attorney.
I wanted to be a role model for my daughter and show her how never to give up.
I wanted to prove that being a mother would not stop me from achieving my goals.
I currently have two degrees and I'm pursuing a law degree. My "why" keeps me from giving up when things get complicated.
Your "why" will be the foundation that will give you the drive to get to the finish line.
Start thinking about your "why" and find your purpose for wanting to achieve your goals.
Once you figure this out, the sky is the limit.
Take care of yourself
Do not burn yourself out.
We tend to keep going and going until we can't anymore. Burning yourself out is not healthy.
Reducing stress levels and maintaining overall health and wellness must be a priority.
Self-care is the best way to achieve this. Go for a walk, read a book (unrelated to your academics), nap, or exercise.
Take a break from everyday activities and focus on something you enjoy doing.
You will be more productive as a college student and a mom. It will increase your potential and help you cope with stressors.
You will not get through school if you're not physically, mentally, and emotionally healthy.
Try to eat healthy as much as possible and drink enough water.
Put God first, make prayer part of your daily routine, and stay encouraged!